As the fringe festival is now over for another year, the venues are closed and the performers are going home- we start to reflect on this year’s festival.
As I look back, there is only one thing that I particularly got from the festival is that I miss performing. There I said it- as someone who once performed at the fringe and has performed many a time before, being at the fringe and watching shows I really miss being on that stage.
How it started
So my experience of performing all started when I joined a local dance company, I learnt dances and got to perform them at annual shows at the Queens Hall in Hexham. My love for dance and performing progressed into my education, so I studied GCSE Drama which then followed onto A Level Dance and Performing Arts. During that time I performed on many a stage in and out of my schooling years and I loved the buzz of being on stage- seeing my family and friends back up at me looking so proud. But I also loved how I made the audience feel- that was the best part, knowing that my performance gave a reaction to the crowd. It would always take me a while to calm down from the excitement of performing.
So why stop?
I stopped at the age of 18 due to school and that is the age you stop being with the dance company. So it was from then that I was starting to think about university and my studies- performing just got lost in the mists and I forgot about it.
However theatre came into my life again but in a different way, when my Grandma introduced me to theatre reviewing at which you can read all about here in my older blogs. And I have to say since starting to review in 2012, watching and writing about theatre- watching the actors do their thang as it were, I have always missed it and been a little jealous of those actors.
Ups and downs
Granted there are pros and cons to performing, it isn’t all razzle dazzle and glam. Blood, sweat and tears goes into rehearsals and then the big performance arrives and the butterflies come into play then you think you can’t do it. It is all very stressful and emotional- you ride a big emotional roller coaster as a performer.
That was one of the things I don’t miss, the constant rehearsing and the stressful times of doing so. Yes it made the performance part worth it, but your opinions and enthusiasm changes for the art and you start to question whether what you are doing is worth it and if you want to go down that performance art route in your career.
Back for good
Thinking about it, I don’t think that I would want to perform on a permanent level. I would just love one last hurrah to be on stage again and get that buzz back that I once had when I used to perform.